“Good luck is the result of good planning”
Every time I check my bank account I cross my fingers that somehow miraculously I’m rich (I literally do this as if it has the power to dump money into my account). I have good luck but not that good. I keep thinking in the back of my mind, “oh well it’ll be fine once I win the lottery”. I’m truly convinced I’m going to win it in the near future, but I don’t even play the lottery. In efforts to keep myself sane and to ward off heart palpitations I come up with these “get rich quick” schemes. I usually think of things that have been done already and only 2% of the sample set actually makes money off of them, but I think my luck is good enough to be in the top percentile.
– Selling every book I own on Amazon. I actually tried this and ended up losing money in shipping. I know you can add to the amount but I never did the math right. Also I really don’t have that many books.
– Starting a freelance calligraphy company, charging $2.50 an envelope. Since I’m a lefty I haven’t gotten past R, S, O, C, D and those are just caps. I did some pro bono wedding envelopes but it was all caps…and pro bono. So I guess that one made me rich in life.
– Starting a blog. I was hoping to get some advertising, but because I’m new to the scene I’m not even sure how to do it. Maybe I should advertise my calligraphy business.
– Breeding beagle/Labrador mix puppies. I’m pretty sure they’re the cutest dogs you could own and although it’s a little Island of Dr. Moraeu I really think the rich and famous would love one. I know I do!
– Being a life coach for uncool teens. I’m starting out with my half sisters, like a trial run. First I will make sure they have no say in what they wear because that is always their first mistake. Second I would make sure they quit marching band and join a sports team. I would certainly ban Hannah Montana but not Miley Cyrus and make sure they understand the importance of cliques.
– If you watch Entourage you see how much money celebrities have. It’s just stupid. I wanna be like, hey E can you pay my BGE bill for the year instead of buying a wardrobe full of black button downs? Or maybe I could get a job with Sloan, who gets to walk around all day looking hot and talking on her cell phone enunciating every word to perfection. I think the one thing I could probably do is become a rock star. I don’t know how to write music but I’m sure it’s not that hard or I could have someone do it for me. Also, I’m pretty sure I could sing as well as Lady Gaga, Katy Perry or Fergie for SURE. I just need a reputable rap group to be my background like the Black Eyed Peas. I wonder what Snoop is getting into these days. All I need is one hit and I’ll take the money and run!