CFDA Awards Round Up

If you live under a rock or you just don’t give a shit about fashion then you’re in luck! This red carpet wrap-up has nearly nothing to do with fashion and mostly to do with hand-picked celebrities life choices.

The CFDA Awards are one of the most prestigious fashion events where designers, models and celebs show up to support their fellow fashionISTAs. In no particular order, here are a few highlights from the event – in case you missed G Rancid on the red carpet.

kimye

I almost didn’t even want to feature KimYe because they’re so trite, but Kanye is sort of smiling so I thought this could potentially humiliate him. Kim is so whatever for me. It’s as if I make a concerted effort NOT to care about her because she’s not a real human.

gigi_hadid

Someone needs to tell me who Gigi Hadid is. She’s like the Rita Ora of 2015 for me. No clue who she is and don’t care enough to Google. Not mad at her jumpsuit tho and she looks fit AF.

karli_kloss

Nohomo but I could def go-les with Karli Kloss. I also do love a girl that can wear a deep V without looking like a hofosho. DVF nailed it with this one.

MK&ABlack satin drapes and capes aside – does anyone else notice how MK&A never open mouth smile? Do they have bad teeth? Seriously the number of times I’ve Googled “Olsen twins teeth” is becoming embarrassing.

Jan_JonesAnother gal-crush of mine, January Jones. My only beef is that she has this creepy smile thing happening similar to John Hamm. The sort of “I know something you don’t know” (sung) look. I don’t even care about her outfit – although I do love a jumpsuit – because she’s so pretty it doesn’t matter. I also love that she had a bastard child and wouldn’t tell anyone who the dad was because she’s that badass and doesn’t give AF. Go girl!

katie_holmes

Ralph Lauren dress here, which is what immediately caught my attention. Then I followed the creamy satin up to the face and saw Katie Holmes and almost doubled over with stomach pain. Seriously tho, who invited her? An old rerun of SNL was on the other day that she was hosting and I thought the same thing. Who is sitting there thinking, “you know who would be a great, current, hot, interesting guest? Katie mother-f*ckin Holmes.” Someone is doing it and I would like their contact information.

jenna_lyons

I had to follow KH with someone I love. Can I BE Jenna Lyons? She’s such a #GIRLBOSS. But for real, she’s a lot of people’s boss. I’ve always wanted to wear a full suit no top look but I look like a walk-of-shame victim. JL nails it hard.

michelle_monaghan

WHEN did Michelle Monaghan lose so much weight? I think she looks FAB but I hope it wasn’t Hollywood pressure. However, her career is blowing up so the correlation is undeniable. Either way, ya-look-great/waif.

katharine_mcPhee

I’m gonna come out and say that I did watch an entire season of that stupid Broadway show Katharine McPhee was on…THREE years ago. She definitely looks like she’s in disguise as someone who has more talent. Maybe a photographer or something? Who’s to say, but it ‘aint a former runner up to American Idol (or did we forget about that?)fat_jewThe Fat Jew. Drinking White Girl Rose. Hopefully the council gets it that he’s messing with everyone. I also can’t help but fawn over his Stubs & Wooten slippers.

betsey_johnsonFinishing off the wrap-up with my girl Betsey. She owns her shit, which I love. She doesn’t even care that it looks like she slept in her makeup the past three nights! I also have a eerie feeling that this is what I will look like in 20 years, and I’m surprisingly OK with it.

 

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Thirty-something #BASIC

No explanation needed here. #Basic has hit every social media feed. Thought it was important to highlight an age specific #BasicBitch

  • Farmers Markets
  • Madewell
  • Color Runs
  • Baby Bump Selfies
  • Farm to table
  • Gender Reveal Parties
  • Panama Hats
  • Benefit Cosmetics
  • “Girls” trips to Naples
  • Quinoa
  • J.Crew
  • Pottery Barn/Crate and Barrel
  • Pho
  • Gluten Free
  • Half Marathons
  • Turkish Towels
  • Coldplay
  • Lululemon
  • Books on CD
  • Hybrids
  • Toms
  • Soul Cycle
  • Lifestyle Blogs
  • Starbucks Gold Cards

Thirty-Something #BASIC Celebs

  • Katherine Heigl
  • Jessica Simpson
  • Katie Holmes
  • Reese Witherspoon
  • Michelle Williams
  • Kate Middleton
  • Honorable Mention: Gwyneth Paltrow

wedding

This weekend one of my best friends from life got married in Brooklyn, NY.  She found someone who truly compliments her and I could not be happier for the two of them.  I was asked to speak at the rehearsal dinner and as this was the 10th wedding I’ve been in, I decided that my speech should be my 10-times-a-bridesmaid advice to the couple.

First and foremost wedding stuff.  You don’t have to tell me what hell it’s been planning.  I know, trust me.  To make life easier – a few things post-nuptial I think would be beneficial for you to consider.

1. Reception: Drink as much as you want…without blacking out of course.  Every sober bride I’ve ever encountered says it “goes by SO fast” so I assume if you get a little buzzed the time doesn’t fly by as quickly.

2.  Pictures: Don’t freak out if they suck. Everyone will only look at them once (even if they’re on Facebook) and you will only look at them a handful of other times when you’re in the mood to be nostalgic (which I’m guessing will be about once a year).

3. Gifts: Bed Bath is no longer giving cash back for gifts but Nordstrom is.  Since we’re on the topic, spoiler alert…I got you guys cash (I’ve finally learned that’s what every couple wants they’re just too polite to ask for it) but I’m going to ask you not to buy anything practical with it.  One suggestion would be to go and buy a bunch of scratch offs for the flight to New Zealand.  I mean, this is a weekend of firsts right?

4.  Honeymoon: No need don’t do anything too extravagant…ummm….have a great time for two weeks in New Zealand you guys.

5.  Thank you Notes: Julia don’t make Rob help you do this, in fact, don’t even do it yourself.  Just send a mass email and BCC everyone.  Unless you want to put a personal note in about what you bought with my cash, but that can be a text. I promise people wont care.

6.  Name Change: Heard this is a real pain in the ass so I would say…just don’t do it.  You can get around to it when you’re pregnant.

7.  I hear people ask newlyweds all the time “hows married life”  – some suggested answers better than “nothings changed”:

“I don’t know, you tell me?“

“Tax breaks, baby!”

My personal favorite, just start laughing then walk away

 

Then just a couple things that will help make it last:

– Get flu shots

– Never let soul cycle interfere with cuddle time – JK but seriously get a king sized bed already!

In all seriousness and to add just a little bit of sentiment.  Never lose sight of what brought you two together, The Wilton High School Field House.